What will Santa bring me? Me being Santa.

Here comes Santa on his sleigh.  What could be in that bag of toys for me?  Well, seeing that I picked it out myself and wrapped it up to pretend it was a surprise...let me think.  I have now heard this more than once, and it's a little disheartening if not disturbing.  How long have you known your significant other?  Have you ever listened during a conversation?  Perhaps the latter question is the most important.  Even if you were half listening during a conversation about the other person's likes, you may pick up on at least one thing that they want.  Observe and report.




I am struck by how we are so out of touch with our lover's interests.  Or, maybe how over the course of several years you did the laundry once or twice and happened to notice what size they wear, or simply WHAT they wear.  No?  Remember, we're going over the basics here.  I am not saying that all of us should be so completely in tune with our lovers' style, but maybe a trend, a color theme, something.  I know that my husband dislikes fitted dress shirts.  He wants a little "breathing" room.  But, I know he likes dress shirts.  So, when I head to the store to get him one, it's definitely not going to be fitted. 


During a Christmas party over the weekend, a spouse said that he no longer purchases gifts for his wife.  She goes on her own, wraps it, and SURPRISE!  It's all an illusion for the kids.  "Boy, Dad sure knows what Mom likes."  The worst part wasn't the lack of shopping now, but how he used to shop, putting future trips to a halt.  His wife weighs a mere 112 lbs.  He said that he would buy her a large shirt, thinking that even his choice may be too small.  I don't think that women are so different that "Large" would mean something completely different than the same size in mens.  Large = bigger, not smaller.  I wouldn't expect him to shop in the petites section if she was short in stature, but at least to get the right size or there abouts.  In this case, it was a complete lazy move on his part. 


Again, we are confronted with Lazy Lover Syndrome.  We figure that the effort is lost on something trivial.  We have already gotten them everything they could possibly need.  What more do they need?  What can they not get themselves? Can they not get it any day of the year?  There is a flurry of questions to talk yourself out of being thoughtful during the holidays.  Sure, it's not fun to spend hours at a mall, where the aisles are packed as tight as sardines in a can.  I get it.  Even browsing the pages of a website online may feel tedious.  But, let us look at it a different way.  What about the excitement of seeing your lover open your present?  There is so much joy in that.  Stop worrying about getting the right present.  You know them well enough to select a gift they will like and appreciate.  "Thought" truly is what counts.  Take some time to listen to what they say when you are window shopping all of the other times of the year.  Make a mental note and come back to it at the holidays.  Simple gestures--see: garbage post--make a big difference.